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Hi everyone and welcome to another episode
of the Style and Strategy podcast.
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So today is one of my one -on -one
episodes as I like to think of them
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So today is one of my one -on -one
episodes as I like to think of them
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because I'm assuming that you're probably
listening to me maybe driving in the car
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because I'm assuming that you're probably
listening to me maybe driving in the car
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or walking, going for a walk as you get
outside and enjoy some fresh air.
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or walking, going for a walk as you get
outside and enjoy some fresh air.
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or walking, going for a walk as you get
outside and enjoy some fresh air.
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or walking, going for a walk as you get
outside and enjoy some fresh air.
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So I really do appreciate having you
listen and hopefully you are getting some
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So I really do appreciate having you
listen and hopefully you are getting some
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practical tips and strategies and just
some interest along the way.
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practical tips and strategies and just
some interest along the way.
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So today is really going to be talking
about a common struggle that I know many
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of us face.
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And especially if you're potentially an A
type personality or someone who likes
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to strive for perfection.
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And so where you've got that, and we're
talking specifically around your brand and
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your style, you know, we have this
pressure to maybe try to get the outfit
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perfect or try to make sure all your I's
are dotted and your T's are kind of
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crossed, which obviously in certain
industries, et cetera, from a technical
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standpoint becomes really critical.
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But when we're talking about our style and
our brand,
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you know, sometimes not getting it 100 %
perfect and taking that pressure off
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ourselves is really important because
everyone has, I would describe it as
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ourselves is really important because
everyone has, I would describe it as
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natural beauty and you know, our authentic
selves do come out.
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So let's talk about some of the specific
areas that
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So let's talk about some of the specific
areas that
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become challenges for people around this.
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So sometimes there's the challenge of
believing that you need to look perfect in
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order to feel successful or be successful
or feel good about yourself.
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And you think that maybe every detail
needs to be flawless, especially when
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you're saying...
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you're scrolling maybe Instagram, YouTube,
whatever it might be, or seeing people
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that you know who your level of perception
of them seems like every detail is perfect
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and they always look on point.
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So it might be from perfectly styled hair
to a meticulously kind of selected or
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chosen outfit.
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And that sometimes can put a bit of
pressure on us and the way that we
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And that sometimes can put a bit of
pressure on us and the way that we
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perceive ourselves.
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So I want you to have a think about
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you know, when you stand in front of the
mirror and you might be critiquing, you
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you know, when you stand in front of the
mirror and you might be critiquing, you
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might be your body shape, it might be, you
know, the look that you've got on, you
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know, maybe you spend hours trying to get
the hair right.
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And, you know, you've tried on maybe five
or six different outfits before finally
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setting on the one.
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It might be that you've got this element
of trying to create that perfect look and
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then
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it really can lead to disappointment along
the way.
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That constant pressure, like I said
earlier, can really make you feel stressed
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and potentially uncomfortable in your own
skin.
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And so you might find yourself in a
situation where you're rushing out the
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And so you might find yourself in a
situation where you're rushing out the
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door and then feeling like your look isn't
quite right.
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Or maybe in trying to perfect every
detail, you actually start to feel really
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drained around doing it and less
confident.
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And then this can then lead to over time,
really feeling like you've eroded your
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self -esteem and you've lost that joy that
maybe getting dressed, you know, doing
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self -esteem and you've lost that joy that
maybe getting dressed, you know, doing
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your hair or whatever that might be, used
to make you feel happy.
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around your appearance.
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So how can that really manifest?
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I guess manifest is probably a word I
would use here in day -to -day life.
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So you might've felt a sinking feeling
when you walk into a room and you see
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everybody else and you perceive that they
look effortlessly perfect.
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Or maybe you've started to compare
yourself.
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unfavorably, right?
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Or maybe there's been instances where
you've decided to skip an event because
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you just didn't feel like you could show
up and you didn't have the right look or
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you didn't have that confidence there.
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So those scenarios can happen in life and
then can really prevent us from
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embodying ourselves and really enjoying
life to its fullest.
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embodying ourselves and really enjoying
life to its fullest.
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And that I believe because it can happen
because society expectations on us often,
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you know, what we're seeing in front of us
is this perception that perfection equals
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success.
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You know, we're bombarded with images of
flawless looks, perfect styles, leading us
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to really believe that
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we've got to meet these standards.
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However, sometimes this mindset can
overlook the importance of just feeling
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good in what we wear and being comfortable
really in our own terms and our own skin.
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Because the reality is that everyone has
imperfections and everyone kind of
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perceives and sees themselves in that way.
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And you know, those perceived flaws or
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what we might call flaws to ourselves is
actually part of what makes us really
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what we might call flaws to ourselves is
actually part of what makes us really
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unique and beautiful.
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unique and beautiful.
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So think about, you know, for those of us
remember, you know, the supermodels of the
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nineties, like Cindy Crawford, if I go
back to that, I'll never forget the
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conversations around that mole that she
had on her face.
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And, you know, there were...
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there was media and feedback around like,
God, she should remove it.
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But she really put a foot down on that and
saying like, it's part of me, this is who
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I am, this is what I'm recognized for.
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And so that pressure sometimes to those
ideals and conforming and trying to stick
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to those standards can feel a little bit
overwhelming, especially if you let it get
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to those standards can feel a little bit
overwhelming, especially if you let it get
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to you.
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So I think it's really important to
remember that those images often don't
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reflect the reality of what is happening.
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You know, we all have those insecurities
and challenges.
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And when we start to become aware of that,
that's when you've got the opportunity to
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And when we start to become aware of that,
that's when you've got the opportunity to
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really shift your mindset from seeking
perfection to really appreciating, you
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appreciating your own personal style, your
own brand and who you innately really are.
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appreciating your own personal style, your
own brand and who you innately really are.
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So what are some steps that you can
potentially take if you feel like maybe,
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So what are some steps that you can
potentially take if you feel like maybe,
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you know, every now and again you fall
into this trap?
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you know, every now and again you fall
into this trap?
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So tip one from me is really start to
appreciate some of those imperfections.
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So tip one from me is really start to
appreciate some of those imperfections.
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So maybe your hair isn't cooperating with
you.
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Maybe your outfit isn't exactly how you
envisioned it would look.
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Give yourself a pat on the back, right?
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That's okay.
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And focus on how are you feeling in that
outfit.
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You know, I always talk about confidence
is your best accessory.
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So feeling good about yourself is what
people will notice.
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instantly when you walk in the room.
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Yes, I talk about first impressions, but
that combination of wearing something that
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makes you feel amazing, then that
confidence will naturally come out as
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well.
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So, you know, you really want to embrace
those quirks that make you you.
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Look, if I talk about me, my hair, I used
to like hate my hair.
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And why?
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Because I didn't have that smooth hair
that you could just walk out of a shower
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and let it dry naturally.
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If I did that, it would be wiry and wavy
and kind of out of control.
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But, you know, it took me a long time to
learn to appreciate those thick waves
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really were a representation of who I was.
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I wasn't that straight up and down and
smooth, slick hair.
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And I learned to instead of fight it,
well,
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to try to figure out how do I allow this
to be me and work with it?
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So, you know, it doesn't always fit the
mold, but they're the things that have the
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opportunity to really set you apart.
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opportunity to really set you apart.
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So start by identifying maybe one thing,
just one thing in your appearance each day
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that you love.
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And this really plays out as well when you
talk about your body and what it is that
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you really appreciate your body.
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We are so quick to identify so many faults
in our bodies.
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We are so quick to identify so many faults
in our bodies.
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And I think it takes us a long time and
life experiences to get to a point where
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And I think it takes us a long time and
life experiences to get to a point where
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you do just appreciate your body for what
it is.
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And I think that's really important.
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shift that you can make to help build that
positive mindset there as well.
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shift that you can make to help build that
positive mindset there as well.
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shift that you can make to help build that
positive mindset there as well.
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Number two, you know, you hear this a lot
about adding a pop of color.
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So I want to be really clear around adding
a pop of color doesn't always have to mean
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a bright, you know, fluoro color.
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But it might be, you know, a particular
color that you've loved, but maybe you
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But it might be, you know, a particular
color that you've loved, but maybe you
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haven't.
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yet been brave enough to try to
incorporate that into your wardrobe.
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You know, we see a lot of neutral tones
out there in the, in style at the moment.
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You know, we see a lot of neutral tones
out there in the, in style at the moment.
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And you know, there's a lot of that coming
through, whether it's your socials and so
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And you know, there's a lot of that coming
through, whether it's your socials and so
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forth as well.
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But sometimes just adding that little bit
of pop of color that you love that will
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work for you in your complexion, you know,
can lift
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your spirits.
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For me, that's a touch of yellow.
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And yet I don't go for a blight fluoro
yellow.
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And yet I don't go for a blight fluoro
yellow.
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But you know, that for me is, you know,
it's a nice warm yellow.
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But you know, that for me is, you know,
it's a nice warm yellow.
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It might be a pastel yellow for you.
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But pick something that might just lift
your spirits or add a touch of joy.
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But pick something that might just lift
your spirits or add a touch of joy.
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You might find that actually adding a
touch of color, like a red even,
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You might find that actually adding a
touch of color, like a red even,
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gives you that energy boost, right?
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Because red's kind of known for that.
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Or maybe a soft blue might calm everything
down.
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So don't be afraid to take that small step
to step out of your comfort zone there and
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maybe try something new on that.
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maybe try something new on that.
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So my third tip around this is keeping it
simple.
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I love making the complex simple and
that's really part of
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I love making the complex simple and
that's really part of
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the way I like to run my programs and work
with my clients.
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So think about that when you are thinking
about your outfits as well.
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It doesn't have to be complicated.
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So maybe think about keeping your outfits
simple, especially on those busy mornings.
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So think about pulling together some
really easy put together looks that in
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your mind feel stylish.
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So, you know, that might be
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If it's easier for you to go for a one
piece item, which might be a dress,
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instead of putting, you know, a top and a
bottom together, then go for that.
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But then look at how can I add maybe one
or two additional pieces to dial it up for
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you and really step into that space.
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You know, and then it's really about
trying to reduce that stress in the
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morning or the next time you've
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got something important to go to where you
really want to dial it up and then helping
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you to start that, start your day on a
more positive note.
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So my tip number four is focus on one
feature you love, right?
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So I talked about looking and celebrating
a particular body shape or something that
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you love when you look in the mirror.
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This really expands on that.
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So that might be
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your eyes, your smile, your shoes, just
something like that.
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But then I want you to add to that and I
want you to highlight that feature.
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So if it's your eyes, think about how can
I add some color that will bring out my
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eye color?
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And so maybe it's a scarf, maybe it's a
top, right?
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Maybe focus on that.
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If it's your smile, then what can you do?
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Maybe it's a brighter pop of color on the
lipstick for a change.
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Again, shoes as an example.
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Maybe, you know, it's a pattern.
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Maybe, you know, you're putting on a very
simple outfit, but you're going for that
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leopard print, right?
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You know, I'm a little bit obsessed in the
leopard print at the moment.
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But I want you to highlight that feature.
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So you can be really simple and think
about that to help accentuate those
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So you can be really simple and think
about that to help accentuate those
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features that you love.
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because then you can really shift that
focus away from what you might be seeing
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as a negative or an imperfection.
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You know, I always remember a time where I
used to have to rush from meeting to
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meeting to meeting, and I'd be back to
back all the time and people would say to
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me, my goodness, you never get a chance to
breathe in between those meetings.
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And I always had to context.
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shift between that.
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But, and one of the things was that I
always looked rushed because my hair was
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But, and one of the things was that I
always looked rushed because my hair was
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always a bit slightly out of control or I
might have pushed my hair through as I
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walked into that meeting.
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walked into that meeting.
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And, you know, that might be where, you
know, I would have thought, my hair always
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And, you know, that might be where, you
know, I would have thought, my hair always
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looks bad.
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But instead of doing that, really starting
to appreciate, as I said a bit earlier,
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you know, that
00:15:30:03 - 00:15:31:18
my hair was naturally like that.
00:15:31:18 - 00:15:34:19
That was just part of who I was and really
starting to just appreciate that because
00:15:34:19 - 00:15:37:21
That was just part of who I was and really
starting to just appreciate that because
00:15:37:21 - 00:15:40:20
that was part of my personality and
finding those things.
00:15:40:20 - 00:15:43:02
that was part of my personality and
finding those things.
00:15:43:09 - 00:15:47:10
So the next time you feel pressured to
look perfect, remember please, it's okay
00:15:47:10 - 00:15:51:07
So the next time you feel pressured to
look perfect, remember please, it's okay
00:15:51:07 - 00:15:57:01
to show that natural beauty, you know,
maybe a little pop of color or just really
00:15:57:01 - 00:15:58:11
appreciating it.
00:15:59:05 - 00:16:05:09
So I hope that you've been able to take
away some tips from today's episode and
00:16:05:09 - 00:16:11:13
I'd love to hear if you've given it a go
and see how it went for you to really dial
00:16:11:13 - 00:16:12:09
that down.
00:16:12:09 - 00:16:14:01
Speak to you next time.
00:16:14:01 - 00:16:14:03
Speak to you next time.